Hillside Hoopin’

This is a game of will power, stamina, and physically fit hips. Yes.  Find a steep hill and be sure to bring along plenty of hula hoops! You’ll also need to pack a healthy supply of Trix yogurt. You start off Hillside Hoopin’ by enjoying/tolerating/suffering through (hey, different strokes for different folks) 5 Trix yogurts. Then, get to top of the hill with your hula hoop. Start hula hoopin’ and once you’ve got a steady swing, begin making your way down the hill, but don’t stop hoopin’! If at any point your hoop hits the ground, OH NO!-- head back to the start. But that’s not all. That’s 5 more trix yogurts down the hatch! Be the first to successfully make it to the bottom of the hill with your hoop still in motion to be victorious.

***Notes:

Vomiting will not disqualify you, but you must measure the volume of vomitosis produced, and take in an equal amount of trix to make up for the loss.

Interfering with fellow hillside hoopers is a six Trix yogurt penalty.

Giggling is allowed.

Happy hoopin’!

Rainy Day Summer-Funtivities

 (Sorry for the delay on this one. I'll try to be more respectful of the deadline in the future)

Taking a break from the standard format in order to address those rainy day blues that drift into town every once in awhile. We might run out of sunshine, but that’s no reason to run out of FUN! I’ve compiled a list of great indoor activities for you to enjoy while the great outdoors takes its shower.

1. Hose in the House: No one can resist a surprise…and who expects to get soaking wet while indoors? NOT ME! Hook up the extension to the garden hose, bring it in the house, and start sprayin’! I hope you expect company, because you’ll certainly be getting a visit from Mr. and Mrs. Good-Times. YE-EAH!

2. Jello Mess: You’re sure to love this one if you love a good mess. All ya’ gotta do is make your way to the family’s prepackaged Jello stash, open all of them at once, dump ‘em on the floor, and start splashing around in the gelatinous, fruity goodness.

3. Bake A Cake (For No One): Bake a cake, present it to someone, and just when they’re about to enjoy their first slice, throw it out, and yell, “THIS CAKE’S FOR NO ONE!” Repeat as many times as you’d like.

4. Baby Races: This one speaks for itself…

5. Table Tag: Split into two teams. Assign each team the same number of tables found within the house (coffee tables, kitchen tables, even desks). The object of the game is to flip over all of the other team’s tables without getting tagged. A winner is declared when a team has successfully flipped all tables. YES!

Park Petting

Park Petting

If you hear any of your buds ask, Hey, you guys/gals (gender neutrality!) wanna go park petting? the correct answer is you bet I do! Not only is Park Petting a much safer alternative to Extreme Petting Zoo (which involves ham, a disco ball, and polar bears), it’s a fun and easy way to make friends with squirrels, rabbits, raccoons, and the occasional possum! It’s also a cutthroat, fiery competition between humans! Yes. You’ll need a ziplock bag filled with Cheez-Its and a park filled with all our favorite furry (rabies carrying) friends! The object of Park Petting is to lure a park creature into open space with a cheesy snack, and then try to get close enough to pet it! YEAH! Be the first one of your friends to pet the animal, and take home the grand prize: ALL THE REMAINING CHEEZ-ITS. ALL of the them. If you’re sick and twisted, play with Animal Crackers. YE-EAH! Warning: Playing this game may lead to rabies.

P.S. Last week was theme park day at the camp I work at. I got to play Vomit-City Clean Up….three times.

Trampolunch

Everyone loves trampolines and lunch, so why not combine them? Trampolunch allows you to embrace the bouncy summertime magic of trampolines while enjoying your favorite lunchtime meal! YE-EAH! It’s really quite simple: get the neighborhood gang together (no, not that kind of gang), gather your lunch supplies, take to the trampoline and start makin’ your lunch while doing your hottest trampoline tricks, and boom—TRAMPOLUNCH. Also bring plenty of cleaning products because you’ll be playing Vomit City Clean Up afterward. YEAH!

Sandy-Boot Blastoff

Boots in summer? That’s crazy! Or is it? Not if you’re playing Sandy-Boot Blastoff! YEAH! This game doesn’t require too much setup. Just head on over to the beach with a pair of high-riding boots and scoop up some sand. Be sure to fill the boot to the tippy-top. Yes! Once everyone in your party has filled their boots, PREPARE FOR BLASTOFF! Find a large structure, preferably a house or a man-beast, and launch your loaded boots over the top and onto the other side. Whoever has the most sand left in their boot after blastoff is the winner! For a spicy variation, fill your boots with sandy tacos.